Why

Why is it that legitimate filmmakers are always searching high and low for investors with little success to generally be had…and conmen, can find a Mark in a matter of seconds? What do the conmen know that we don’t? I have hesitated to comment on this topic because it’s absurd, sophomoric…redundant in a number of respects. At the least, I am demonstrating that I’m far more interested in playing the X’s and O’s of absurd hypothetical than actually doing things that will further my career (yes…more dilemmas, I suggest you get used to them)…yes…more film insanity is what you are witnessing….

….but seriously, what lessons are there to be learned? Conartists create a great con (saving children in the jungle, return on investment), dress the part, play the role and take the Mark for all he’s got. The conman is organized, through, he’s always closing (Always Be Closing), charming, memorable, using body language to gain trust and maybe his greatest strength is his ability to convince the Mark that this is a very limited offer that he needs to act on quickly.

I am proposing that we become con-artists. Dress the part, play the roles and sell the deal. I would have no problem going to a bar and taking part in a con where we pretend to sell a guy some diamonds…I mean I have the balls to do that kind of thing. So how can the film proposition be so different?

I think we are too honest, to caring to trusting; I think we are too willing to do the work that needs to be done and save humanity…instead of being bloodthirsty. Maybe we need a little of both is what I am getting at.

We must think and act like conmen…the only difference is that what we are selling is real…what we are selling is the magic that is the cinema.

COOPRDOG

A New year is a new chance

Listen, I know what you are going through. The economy is shit, people aren’t fucking you right now, it cold as fuck in LA…and the prospect of filmmaking seems like years off…yeah, I feel you.

That’s why I’ve come up with Cooprdog’s 5 step plan to get you through this.

Step 1: Develop some sort of a substance abuse problem. You’re a lot more interesting and fundable if it looks like you have demons to hide. Take me for example.. I have a substance abuse problem and outstanding warrants…I’m a potential golden globe winner

Step 2: Date someone who is really interesting and kind of strange. Strippers, hookers, people acquitted of double murder are all great potential mates…and no one fucks you like a crazy person so that’s a two-fer.

Step 3: Drive something unusual. Look I know your Honda Accord gets great gas mileage, but it’s like hella safe (might as well be a Volvo). You want something that’s a little older, hopefully with a little rust. Bonus points if there are stains on the seats and somewhat of an odor (tell them the car was used in a bank robbery and a few of the perp’s got shot and killed…and you are keeping it authentic.

Step 5: Don’t live near the beaches. Listen… I really mean this…you have to immerse yourself around real people. Don’t get me wrong I’m the first person to assfuck a Santa Monica Chick…but you don’t want to live there. Makes them think you have money and if you have money you really don’t need money

Ok… once you get all that down then we can move on to the next major portion: Your attitude. You can’t walk around like a little boy who lost his puppy when you are looking for money. Did you see Swingers? “We got to act like we don’t need this shit…and then they give us this shit for free”. I’m totally fucking serious. It’s all about your attitude.
Yes I’m kind of cracking jokes (except for the thing about dating someone interesting – dating a single mom who lives in the valley is just not worth the miles you have to drive) but there is some truth to it. As filmmakers we are individuals…much more individualistic than other arts. This is something you must embrace and wear like a red Badge of courage. It is our singular individualism and our approach to constructing images that will release financing…not how good our scripts are.
Yes, I know you doubt that last statement….but let’s delve a little deeper shall we. If you were to sit down with any group of financiers of American Independent film…specifically those who fund first time feature directors there is one thing that you will hear echoed over and over again. They quest to work with people who have a tremendous amount of vision and who are somewhat uncompromising in the way this vision is executed.
When I’m pursuing investors (when am I not pursuing investors) I often tell the story of two directors who are both looking for funding. Director A lives in the valley, owns his home, is married, has two beautiful kids and is funny. The EP comes over with all the potential investors and this guy fires up the grill…starts his stand-up routine and generally lets everyone know that he’s a swell guy and he has a good film. When asked why they should make this film he responds “..because it will mean a lot to a great many people”. They really like him…but still are unsure if the risk they are assuming is worth the payoff. Then there is director B. He lives in a small apartment that’s kind of messy. The EP is somewhat reluctant to take the investors to meet him because he’s very eclectic. The EP’s become even more curious and literally demand to meet the guy. The EP says “are you sure?” He tells them to meet him at the corner of 5th & Alameda and to wear dark colors. He rendezvous with them and has them follow him to Director B’s apt. Once parked outside he gives them some instruction: “don’t ask him to turn on more lights…he likes it dark”; “Don’t ask him to speak up or to come closer…he’s a bit aloof and likes his space…he’ll come closer when he feels comfortable”; “…and whatever you do, do not…I repeat, do not ask about the stuffed dog!” The investors are scared and excited, they don’t know what to expect. After a few raps on the door the director opens it and lets the entourage in. His apartment is cluttered with DVD’s and movie posters. The guy looks like he just fell off of a fruit truck and when he speaks he seems to be talking to the universe. As strange as this situation is, the investor are captivated. One of them who is more daring than the rest of the lot dares to ask why they should make this film. The director responds “…because if we don’t make it someone could die”.
Yes, I am being a bit facetious…but I think you get my point. For those that don’t make film, for those that don’t write scripts…it’s a very sexy, mysterious business. This is what you need to sell. Now is not the time to pitch safe romantic comedies with a pg-13 rating. Now is the time to take a risk. None of us are really getting funded in this present credit environment…so, why not go for it?
The victory will mean a lot less to you if you play it safe and do exactly what they want.

Go for it, Bitches!

COOPRDOG

3D Hoopla

If you have been paying attention to the shifting sands and changing territory that is the exhibition industry you are aware that 3D is returning to the theaters in a big way. I live in West Los Angles and I went on the Real D site to search and see how many 3D theaters there are in my metropolitan area. The answer was 50. I wasn’t exactly surprised by that because it’s a given with digital distribution technologies and Dreamworks has announced that they are all-in on 3D films for 2009.
I then began to read blogs and comments on blogs and industry and a whole bunch of shit on 3D cinema and what it means and how it may revive the film industry. I think it’s all a load of shit and I’m about to tell you why.

Even if 3D is as amazing as they say it is, and no – I’ve yet to see one of the new 3D films (I’ll get to that in a second), even if the image is a captivating as they say it is and even if the writers and directors of the film industry can get up to speed fast enough to help this technology turn filmgoing on its ear (talk about a big “if”) I do not believe it will fundamentally change the industry.
Why do you ask? Because, just as I have underscored with digital distribution, this does not address the ills of exhibition. The industry suffers from an overbuilt supply of screens, a homogenization of narratives and an endless supply of sequels to ancient pre-sold property.

But that’s not what I’m really upset about; what really sets my dick on fire is that thought that an element of filmmaking will change how the film is received. We already know that is now true. Directors like Jerry Bruckheimer and James Cameron and Michael Bay were instrumental in making movies (crashes and explosions) big, badder and louder. Whatever the sequence was…it had to be big. This led us to ridiculously long stunt sequences like “The Transporter” where car chases last several minutes (which is laughable because either you get away or you crash…two cars racing nose-to-tail in rush hour traffic or around shipping containers on a dock for an endless amount of time defies the physics of a 3-dimensional universe. Lest we not forget the visual element component of “The Matrix” that ushered in a slew of films that merely had pretty pictures.

What all of this taught us was that no amount of stunts or explosions or visual elements or CGI vistas and landscapes can take the place of a decent script…and that is why I think this new 3D initiative is laughable.
Does feeling as if you are actually in and part of a bad movie not make it as bad? How many elements can you direct at the screen? How much does it enhance a horrible scene if you feel like you can touch the coffee table? I’m not being a dick…these are legitimate questions that need to be answered.

I guess there are sufficient numbers of people that will line up to see The Hulk IV in 3D…but will the premise be any more believable? This country and the world will soon tire of men in tights flying around and saving the world from evil men in tights who wish to destroy the world. The film industry is so concerned with kids themes that it makes me wonder how much juice if left in the fruit?

In a country that is experiencing the largest financial debacle since the great depression, an endless occupation in Iraq, a the largest deficit in history, mass loss of thousands of pensions and retirements due to all of these corporate failures I would think that there is a growing market for adult (non-PG) entertainment.
But that is not what we are going to be sold. The upcoming release schedule for 3D films is almost all kiddie cinema not to mention the resurrection of extremely old narratives. I just am not willing to believe that there is a significant upside for this. Sure, kids are born every year and kids need something to watch…but not 85% of all filmed entertainment.

But that is not really what burns me up. You are witnessing the degradation of the those who create intellectual property…that means writers, actors and directors…not to mention DP’s (cause you can’t really have a DP trying out new techniques in one of these films…you need to stick to what they know…which is static cameras and a lot of watching people talk).

Can you see how quickly the environment has changed and how the pace is quickening? What’s next?...extended sequences with no dialogue which will resemble embedded misuc videos in a film so that we can really show off the technology? Laugh if you want, but this is where we are headed.

Films are driven by narratives. I’ve never seen a great film that didn’t have a great narrative…it’s just that simple. This is not meant to discount the effect of women with big tits, over-the-top-car-stunts, excess profanity or any other portion of your favorite films that made them your favorite…but what makes you return to films like “Swingers” and “Bad Santa” and “The 40 yr old Version” and “Stripes” and “Harold & Kumar go to white Castle” is the writing.
I can’t fucking wait to see how lame this idea becomes. I mean really people…do you think this is going to fly? Here’s a little Cooprdog analogy for you: You can dress up a porn star in the best clothes and give him all the acting classes you want…if he can’t fuck the living shit out of his female co-star the movie ain’t gonna sell (…uh.. I watch a lot of porno).

..ok, I just fucking can’t take it anymore…I gotta get some weed

COOPRDOG

What to do now

We are in a recession, this much is obvious. Now I am aware that there are those of you out there that still cling to the technical definition of a recession and until you see two successive quarters of contracting GDP you will loudly proclaim that we are not in a recession…but I don’t want to get into all the “maybe this…maybe that” that is economic forecasting and analysis. I want to talk about how this applies to you as a filmmaker.
Whether or not you stay glued to your financial screens, whether or not you can name commentators on CNBC and Bloomberg is irrelevant because we, as an industry, are indelibly linked to the financial industry. I say this because nothing is greenlit without financing and many of those from whom we solicit funds are either direct beneficiaries of, or directly affected by, the status of the financial markets.
Yes, I know… you didn’t go to business school. Most of you are probably not even sure what the Federal Reserve bank does and why it has two rates, but that’s ok (actually it’s not you really need to educate yourself but for the purposes of this discussion it’s…kind of ok) I don’t require you to be able to explain the dual mandate of The Fed. or why the dollar cannot rally in the present environment. What I want to underscore is how this is affecting your desire to have starlets do bumps of coke off your cock.
I, like you, am looking for funds to shoot. I have two options – find someone with access to financing (production company with a fund, studio with a line of credit, entertainment lending institution) or find someone with the cash money and the requisite lack of judgment to give a good chunk of it to a filmmaker. Either way you go, you will encounter persons and entities that are constrained by the credit crunch.
But I think I’m going to quickly… so let’s go over the basics:
1) Mortgages: When a person gets a mortgage on a house that they wish to purchase, their monthly mortgage payments are combined with other monthly mortgage payments to create a stream of cash flows. How you ask? Well, several million people are taking out mortgages each year (in a normal market). That’s several million people paying down on interest and principal on a monthly basis to a bank. Since mortgages come in few varietites (30yr, 15yr, ect.) the length of the payments (amount of time the homeowner will be cutting checks) and the size of the payments is quite predictable. Therefore all these payments can be grouped and sold as a bond. There are different levels for different qualities of mortgages, we call the tranches. The Upper tranche has no prepayment risk and no default risk (well that’s how it’s supposed to work)

An investor can then purchase a bond or a Assest backed security at whatever risk level they want and receive monthly interest on the bond…which is really the monthly mortgage payment that passes through the investment back (deducting fee’s and transaction costs) and then back to the end investor. This Mortgage pass-through vehicle is a cornerstone of our economy.
The subprime problem was that a number of these mortgages were written to people who don’t have the income to cover the rapid increase in their interest rate (a typical ARM can be readjusted 200 basis points (2 percent) per annum)…this causes a cashflow problem.
Due to the cashflow problem, banks won’t take the mortgages as collateral and banks won’t admit how much of their mortgage portfolio’s contain this bad mortgage debt.

2) No Lending means no Liquidity: Liquidity can be thought of as excess funds. If your car drops its transmission – and you have ample liquidity in your checking account or other investments – you can cover the temporary increase in expenditures without paying your rent or carpayment late.
Now… how does this effect entertainment lending? Well there is this thing called a reserve requirement, this is the portion of funds depostited in a bank that must physically be on the premises at any given time. What happens is that a panic sweeps through the financial markets, people want to see and hold their money, but if more than 10% of the depostiors try to withdraw funds on a single day…the bank would become insolvent.
So, banks call in their lines of credit because the need the excess reserves and as a result there is less money in circulation and less money available to lend and the money that is being lent, is being done so at much higher rates.

What does this mean to you? Well, all the slick motherfuckers that have these lines of credit in the film industry have received letters and phone calls informing them that the size of the line of credit (and in some cases the entire thing) has been severely reduced and the cost to use what remains has significantly increased. So we now see an entertainment lending environment where less risk is desirable. Companies can still make films, but they will shoot few films and try to reign in the budgets to further reduce the risk.
So, why make a $50M action vehicle that may be in post production for several months, when you can shoot a $2M romantic comedy with a B-list actor and take your chances at the box office. Maybe that example is a little absurd (not really) but that’s the environment that we are facing.
If you haven’t noticed, there is a whole bunch of nothing going on. Now is a good time to write a script, develop an addiction, go back to school or go to a writers retreat…because things will be slow for while.

What am I doing? I’m looking for small and medium sized production companies that have scaled down their production schedule or producing all together…and trying to see if I can do some freelancing.
What is in demand right now is skilled shooters. If you are a mini-DV hack with little understanding of how films are funded and distributed then you present a serious liability for anyone who works with you. This is not a time to be experimental (not that I ever think you should stop thinking outside the box) this is a time to be practical. If you can bring a project in – ontime and under budget without all the primadonna shit that normally accompanies principal photography you will find yourself busy. If you have a multi-hyphenate designation (writer-Director, DP-director, Director-editor) you are extremely valuable right now.

Flight to quality: The term “flight to quality” is what we in finance refer to as a large movement of funds from corporate bonds and riskier issues to Treasury bonds – which give less of a return but are guaranteed against default. Similarly if you were to sell all your shares in Mom-and-Pop-Ltd. And use the proceeds to buy shares of a reasonably large blue chip stock with strong fundamentals (cash flow, sales growth, ect.) that would also be termed as a flight to quality.
We also have a flight to quality in film. It is really not in a production company’s best interest to make wild bets on unproven talent with scripts in genres and visual territory that most of America is not familiar with. Sure, you could have a break out hit – but the chances are few in such an environment and the downside (an unwillingness to back your ideas in the future) is quite considerable.
Now listen to me, I’m not telling you to start writing scripts about little girls who cry and just wish they had a better relationship with their Daddy…I’m telling you to circle your wagons and focus on your strengths. When this blows over there will be a scramble like we haven’t seen in quite some time. When the trust and the financing returns everyone cannot continue to make “safe” films because the market will have reached a saturation point.
Your job is to maximize the return (financial, artistic, critical or otherwise) for a given budget and script in the hopes that when they are ready to get a little “racier” that you will be the obvious choice.

Ok.. I have a script to write you bitches….

COOPRDOG

Where I have been

I have been enjoying the silence. That is where I have been and that is what I have been doing. Allowing all of those critical of my ideas and intentions to question my commitment to film and art and loudly proclaim that I am (was) all smoke and mirrors. I simply became tired of being that guy…you know, that one that just talks and never seems to do anything. Well, that’s not really a fair assessment of my artistic past because I have shot a film…but for the film industry that was eons ago. Suddenly all my work in public access and bullshit student productions is all but forgotten. Suddenly my Epic/calling card short that was so full of visual style and production value and ego that the “independent” claim of Scott and myself was perpetually in question was now just a short. So what if I shot on film, so what if I had car stunts and insurance and production cubes…it was all old news for most people.

I tired of my stump speeches and the never-ending optimism that filmmakers are supposed to have; it has always been grossly out of step with my rigid, glass-half-empty, east coast approach to situations. So I decided to stop the marketing I am so famous for. I must say that I enjoyed the curious change in the approach to dealing with me. It seems that when you talk incessantly about a topic to the extent that the words “obsessive” and “compulsive” are often used in close proximity to your name (and not in the good sense) that the masses begin to distance themselves. Of course now, now I have lost the love for film, now that I am apparently consumed by doubt in my own abilities and fear of my own success the end is supposedly near. Now the rumors are that I am afraid, or even worse have decided to just spend Mom’s money and fuck chicks and leave all that “accomplishing things on my own” shit on the back burner.

If there are two things you should know about me it is as follows. Rarely am I silent, rarely do I not have a comment to make or an opinion to give to those who are willing (and unwilling) to listen; additionally I have no real fear of failure. Fear of failure is something that is reserved for those who haven’t tried to do that much, haven’t failed that often and haven’t gotten back up several times after a good hit (good hit…good hit!). Luckily I’ve dropped a baton at the Penn Relays in front of more than 10K people, failed CFA level -1 three consecutive times, lost 35 straight track event races, had 5 shorts die in principal photography and had my heart broken so many times that intelligent people question what is the purpose of reassembling all the pieces for yet another attempt, blown an engine in my Z, made a woman pregnant, got my moped impounded by Marlton’s finest minutes after I promised my mother I wouldn’t ride it till I got my license . And lest we not forget the illustrious dating past like moving tweaker Melissa into my apartment so she could work on her meth addiction full-time with no interruptions, or maybe I should mention how I found out that a girlfriend of mine got engaged to another man during a highly publicized lawsuit against one of the major networks…and my attorney found out before I did. Maybe I should discuss the infamous Kristine who dated me for nearly 5 straight years and never introduced me to her parents, or maybe I should talk about Jamie and how I woke up one day and realized that I had been foolish and that 10 years of my life was never going to return and would pay no dividends…I guess what I’m trying to say is that I am no stranger to loss.
Never do I quit. I’m down for the get down…I’m up for the down stroke, I’m in it win it ( call me Lotto bitches!) the real deal like Holyfield…this is who I am, this is where I am…so let the chorus of the doubtful sing, I have long been tone deaf to their harmony’s. I have never quested to be the most well know or the most well paid or the most fucked or the most recognized…and this is what it looks like. I am no more discouraged than Arthur Miller before the breakthrough of “Death of a Salesman” so you can stop worrying about me.
I am quite amused by those who think that I’m a spoiled brat who always get what he wants and has never had to work for anything. These are the things that are being said about me on a nearly daily basis. The concern has reached a fever pitch. It is due to this situation, these concentric circles of doubt that surround my film existence that I wish to address.

Film is all that matters to me. Don’t get me wrong, my Z is almost as precious as my dick and I really miss Cooper (I had to put him down)…but this has always been about film for me. Film is the reason I stopped speaking to my father, film is the reason I didn’t marry Kristine. Film is the reason I moved to west in the middle of the night after a nasty fight with a girlfriend 15 years my senior. Film is the reason I didn’t speak to my mother for 5 years. Film is the reason that Canada and I didn’t make it. Film is the reason I threw a book across the media section of Border’s Books on the promenade and was summarily ejected from the store. Film has been the motivating factor in my life since before College (I’m about to turn 40…well next year… (Fuck you Jody!)). So the notion that I have somehow given up…is ludicrous. It is the sole meaning for my existence and those who say different have never really had a conversation with me…that much is obvious.
Success can never be measured in the present tense, you would think that we would understand this by now. I, for one, enjoy this loss of respect by the industry in general. It has given me an opportunity to taste defeat yet again. To sink my teeth in to the darkest, coldest, emptiest feeling that most of us will come to know…the inability to live up to your intellectual and creative potential. For those that never try, for those that set the bar low…this is never a concern. You don’t worry about your vertical leap or even your handles when you are playing on an 8ft rim.
But this is not a pity party and this is not a “hey, look at me blog”…this is what filmmaking is. After you get the money, after you tell the lies, after you shoot, after you get to picture lock, after you raise a ruckus on the festival circuit…you may very well return to the withering desert that is the development of projects and the search for funds.
So yet again the quest a begins, yet again the quest continues…one in the same really. Film be it development or production, financing or post is a perpetually state of “Jesus-fucking-Christ I have to get this shit done.” And this is where I am…
This will not be a long blog by Cooprdog standards but I do believe that it will communicate effectively to its intended audience. To those of you who have been on the beaten path for quite some time, for those of you who find themselves defending positions and attitudes you have long established and many times defended, fear not. You are not alone and you are not losing your mind. Well, that’s not completely true, you cannot work in this industry for any severe length of time and not have a sizable loss of your wits…but that’s the point. It’s the journey and not the destination.
Yeah, I get that you want to have big tittied women riding your shaft (or soup-can cocked studs drilling you into submission) while extolling the virtues of high speed photography and simple camera set-ups; but is that really why you do it? I understand that the money and the fame and the power that comes with a hot feature is a very intoxicating mix of rewards and respect, but is that why you do it? I can see that the ability to have one of the badass DGA jackets and to have your whip always valet parked in the front of every establishment is a beauty of a perk (Beauty Clark)…but is that why you do it?
Let me tell you why I do it. Because I have to, because the voices never stop, because I haven’t slept since the early 80’s, because every time Spielberg makes a film people like me become more and more invisible, because every time Lucas adds another installment or re-releases another installment of his mammoth epic I am haunted by the fact that according to him and Gene Roddenberry’s legacy that there are few blacks and few women in our not too distant future. Because Kevin Smith doesn’t really have anything to talk about that doesn’t include dick jokes or comic book themes. Because “Iron Man” is an ancient piece of intellectual property, so is “Fast and the Furious” and “Batman” and all the shiny, happy shit that they love to release.
What I am trying to communicate to you is that this is much larger than me and the stakes are much higher than blows to my ego and a loss of face. That being stated, my temporary absence should be seen as temporary…for people like myself can never stay away from the art for long.
So…why do you do it? What have you been up to? And what are you trying to prove? It is going to be a very long journey my friends and this is not the time to get cold feet. I’m here till they shut the industry down or I die of a venereal disease (she better be hot though).


COOPRDOG

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Where it's at...

The process of filmmaking is not nearly as confusing as they would have us believe and at the same time it’s far more complicated than the “Shoot your first film in 30 days” filmmaking books that seem to endlessly inhabit the bookshelves of filmmaking bookstores. This isn’t as confusing as it seems…trust me.

For starters, making a film is not as complicated as say, bringing someone back to life or curing cancer. I have chosen a some drastic example because due to the nature of the processes that must happen to create a film…there is a general feeling that it’s kind of impossible; but is it? There are only three things that need to happen; you need the script/film/project that you want to shoot, you need the money to shoot it and you need the patience and discipline to finish these tasks…that’s it. While it is true that these steps make take you several years to complete, they are hardly impossible. The game is to make you think that it can’t really be done or even visualized on a small scale. This is pretty much where filmmaking has been since its inception, like it or hate it…it has come to define what this art form is.

And then there is the other side of the street where the booksellers and the IFP people tell you that filmmaking is not really that complicated, that anyone can do it. Well, we all know that this is not true. While just about anyone can raise/borrow money, find a script and some actors and start shooting, that’s a far cry from the meticulous process of creating a unique and individual film. I find it amusing that all the books and all the gurus and all the secret websites that divulge all this “precious” information have really had only one effect; homogenization of filmmaking.

Has it not occurred to you that if all of us read the same books, are inspired by the same films and strive to be like the same director that we will create a boring and stagnant media? We are not making widgets and we are not slapping shiny patches on cheap clothing. Films have a real value that we call rewatchability and it’s what separates the good from the truly horrible.

I am stating these things because I have the answer. Yes, I know that I have said that before, but I mean it this time…I mean… I’m ready to tell you what I’ve been up to.

I’ve realized that self-distribution is the only way to go, but that in and of itself is a misleading statement. Self-distribution as we understand it is one maybe two people, driving around the country in a VW bus or Vanagon with 8 ½ X 11 monochrome onesheets that are four-walling theaters and hoping the Gods of limited release smile upon them…that’s not what I am talking about. Nor am I talking about digital distribution…here’s a newsflash, I hate digital distribution…and here’s another newsflash, I’m not the only one.

I am only concerned with physical delivery. Digital has a lot of empty promises and I have not time for that shit. What empty promises you ask?

The empty promises of Digital distribution:

1) If films just need to be downloaded from a server, then there are no “real” distribution costs and hence distributors will take more risk and be more open to “non-traditional” film.

This is the biggest line of bullshit I’ve ever heard. For starters, digital distribution requires consolidation of the industry. How do I come to that opinion in the early stages of the digital initiative? Well, I’m looking at the process of exhibition a film now. We used to rely on physical prints being duplicated and mailed around the country (planet) to be screened. The physical delivery system allows any print to played in any theater at anytime, digital does not do this. The file that your film is compressed into has to be bounced off of a satellite. How many people either have a satellite or have enough money, clout and political connections to get their shit put on a satellite that is about to launch? Not many! But I’m ignoring the obvious, all these files rely on codec’s which I’ll call the compression/decompression process of playing the file. Now if you are a tin-foil hat wearing crazy man like myself you know that there really aren’t’ that many different companies making the codec that allows you to play a film. It’s a handful of companies vying for dominance…but let’s look deeper shall we? The codec allows the file to be played only at certain times and only on the associated equipment. There is no open-source in this industry, there is no “opening the great coffers” or art. On the contrary, the codec system; the small number of players, the inability to play the file where you want and when you want (without paying for additional screenings) is nonexistent. So, let me ask you this: Do you think it will be easier to get your film screened when it has to be downloaded than if it were a physical print?

Now, I am obviously using the extreme examples to make my point, but my point (and examples) are still valid. Digital distribution is a consolidation of power of the major players and those who wish to be major players. It allows content providers to not only monitor each playing of their media, but also to make the entire process more profitable. But that’s not really why I am against digital distribution, my real reason is much more upsetting.

Digital distribution does not fundamentally change the way you view films. Yes, it’s a 1 or a 0 instead of light passing through a frame…but we are still selling tickets, screening films and standing in line to do so. The only real difference is that digital gives the studio and the distributor a lot more control. But you don’t have to believe me; go over to some of the numerous sites and blogs dedicated to the exhibition industry and read what the theaters have to say. Read how theater owners don’t really understand why they need to spend several million dollars to digitally project the same shitty movies they were sent last year. This is a money grab that had nothing to do with expanding the geography of indie films (both in story creation and where the films play), but wait it gets better. We have been told that the new, more efficient, non-tangible delivery system will reduce the implicit and sunk costs of distribution making it a safer endeavor for everyone…oh really?

Well, let me throw this at you: if it costs less for distributors to acquire and distribute films, how does this change your life as a filmmaker? Only if distributors take increased risk in purchasing films, only if producers take more risk in developing projects and greenlighting projects will we see this happen. But we are seeing the opposite with digital distribution. The whole “bouncing media off satellites” thing seems to not mention doing so with small indie films…because that would defeat the purpose. They want rapid consumption of popcorn entertainment and PG-13 content and while you yourself might create those kinds of things (I don’t know why…we have a ton of it) the body of American Independent film is much different from that description.

2) Digital is better.

Is it? In what manner do you mean? Is it a more real, more true image? Are the presence of 1’s and 0’s more sensitive and romantic than the light that bounced off of an object? There is less of a chance of films being screened in the incorrect aspect ratio? There is less of a chance of bad films being shot? Please, film has one component that will never change…the participation of people. Someone has to play the file and someone has to buy the ticket and someone has to write the script. There is a feeling that once digital distribution arrives that it will run itself…c’mon now, do you really believe that? People will download the file, people will play the file and screen the film. Sure you can automate the process, but you will have to watch it eventually, and you will have screen it for people eventually. You will have to talk about the process and you will have to make guarantee’s. This is a relationship business and that will never change. Digital is not better, digital is not worse…it’s just a different format.

3) We can switch between films more quickly and thus films will be more profitable and then the theaters will take more chances and show more films…cause they have more idle time.

Contrary to popular belief the switching of reels is not what takes time. Cleaning the theater takes times and showing you ad’s takes time. The theater makes a fair amount of income from showing you advertisements and they are disinclined to limit the appearance of them…but I’m getting off point. The ability to quickly change between films (forms of media) meaning nothing when the dynamics of human resource deploying are what really limit the speed of screening films. But wait…there’s more. It’s not really in a theaters best interest to constantly flip through media. We are all creatures of habit and we know what we like. People go to midnight movies because there are film screening at midnight. The speed at which they can switch from the latest Hugh Grant romantic comedy to the Rocky Horror Picture show has no real effect on the revenues.

4) It’s a better picture

Really? Do you think that most of you could tell the difference between 200 frames shot on digital and 200 frames shot on 35mm? Do you think the average person could? Let’s go further shall we? Say I have some legendary film… like “Titanic”. Assume further that I am screening this film in theater #1 in 35MM and theater #2 digitally projected and that I charge the same price; which theater will sell out first? Will the viewers have a preference? The answer is no… unless you are a filmmaker the differences between film and digital are so subtle that you won’t notice them. So that begs to ask the question: if I charged a dollar more for digital would people pay the additional dollar for the experience? Let’s go even further and charge a dollar less for film. But we know that movie attendance is heavily dependent on ticket prices (negatively correlated) and viewers will always gravitate to lower prices (that’s why theaters have reduced prices for matinee). What we do know is that the only thing that matters to audience is the quality of the film (story). How it is delivered to them is of no consequence.

5) Digital is the future!

Is it? Are you sure? I am sure that we will continue to watch films as long as we exist, but that is all that I am sure of. Digital does not fundamentally change the way we make and view films. The core business has not changed so what makes you think that this is the only way this can go down? Film is not music. We take music with us, we play music in a variety of different places…not so with film. You can watch a feature in your car, or on you Iphone or in your house on your plasma. But none of that is remotely similar to the spectacle of 35MM projection. Film does suffer greatly from compression and a lack of attention. To truly be appreciated it must be seen on a large screen in the dark with persons who are attentive.

It was due to all of these things that I decided to start my own distribution company, a physical distribution company. In the coming days I will explain it all to you…if you’re still reading me that is?

COOPRDOG

Don't you Believe it...

That’s the question I have, do they mean what they say? When you go to these symposiums and lectures and meet and greets and meet established film personnel and they say something like “give me a call next week” or “I think I know someone who might be interested in your film, we should talk” what does that mean? It certainly doesn’t mean call me, or stop by my office. This behavior is often met with repeated dishes to voicemail or “he’s in a meeting, can I take a message”. I know I sound like I’m just bitchin’, but let’s seriously talk about this.

We know that most of our industry is appearance. We are well aware that handshakes and business cards don’t amount to very much in this industry. But because this is a relationship business and all of the deals are made by people who know each other in one capacity or another, it behooves you to play this game.

This is where I think we start to stray. We are clamoring to have pretend conversations with individuals who really can’t be bothered. I supposed if they saw a really impressive film, and weren’t in the middle of receiving oral sex or being charged with murder that maybe they would help us. I supposed if they weren’t flying to wherever the fuck they fly to and having “real” meetings, that one of us could get a shot.

But that’s just it. I am starting to think that it’s all window dressing. I’m starting to think that much of our interaction with the Hollywood Apparatus (because I consider myself an independent) is make-believe. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe that real conversations and real deal are being discussed somewhere…just not where they tell us.

I think it is in everyone’s best interest that new filmmakers not become immediately discouraged with the size of the task of making a film. This is where the lip service enters in. I think that those who give us lip service are well aware of the odds and probably chances of you actually having a conversation with someone who can help you; therefore they participate in these round-table-discussions where they are instructing no-budget shooters on how to get a completion bond and what talent agency financing is because it’s a nice way for them to feel good about their chosen occupation and to “talk to the little people”. I’m not saying it’s all ego and lip service, but it’s not like they come to these things prepared to meet the next great director.

I am incessantly bombarded with invites to marketing discussions and limited speaking engagements by film industry “insiders”…and I show up only to hear them bloviate on their experiences in this industry and how they got to the top. The fact that the environment from hence theses projects came is forever changing and old strategies rarely work seems to never be discussed.

Lemme tell you, nothing makes my dick drool faster than a Baby-Boomer who entered the industry at a time when it was geometrically less competitive that it is right now, and tell me that all I have to do is….they have such courage and conviction when telling you to confronts odds that they never would have confronted…do you see the hypocrisy?

The gall, the arrogance of these people who didn’t have to take half of the personal inventory that the contemporaries have to…and elicit advice like “just keep at it”. Please, I would have loved the opportunity to compete in the mid 70’s, or the mid 80’s….but I digress…

Just keep at it: This is the advice given to prodigy’s and people who are utterly and completely wasting their time. The level and intent of the statement utter is identical. You have no real way of knowing if you are wasting your life and you possible retirement income until you blow up or file bankruptcy.

It is for that reason that I don’t give a fuck…I really don’t. I don’t care if my film gets made (lie), I don’t care if I ever get married (truth) and I really don’t care if I die tomm (at least I’d die as an artist that refused to compromise).

Ok..have to book my next movie theater distribution possibility meeting.

COOPRDOG