Monday, April 17, 2006

MISSION PICO:

So Yoda makes the right hander (like mad illegal-from the left turning lane without a signal type shit)..and we are traveling east up Pico. So Yoda spots a flypost billboard and pulls over. Now realize that we are on Pico…which means you can see for almost a mile since it’s so fuckin’ flat. Even worse, this is a no-fly zone for LAPD. This may be a bad idea.

So Ice and I have yet to get out of the fucking car and Yoda starts to get pissed and says something to the effect of…. “is there a problem boys? Is Yoda gonna have to choke a bitch?” Now with my manhood bruised and my head spinning with nightmare scenarios of getting shot from behind with a pink sponge in my hand…I stagger onto the curb.

Yoda is a pro. She has the wheat glue (which is some scary lookin’ shit… let me tell you…if an elephant would ever shoot a boogie out of his nose…this is the shit that would be attached to the boogie….you feel me?) and the posters and the brushes and she is going at it. She leaves all the passenger doors open to shield us from traffic seeing what we are doing. She moves in assembly line fashion. Slabbing this wheat glue on the back making sure the corners are well covered and barking orders at us. The shit is like pledging, I walking quickly but not too quickly staying an equidistance from Ice and apply my poster right next to the one he just applied, giving it a quick wipe with the sponge and fleeing the scene.

Yoda is running us like dogs and we hang something like 25 posters in 8 min’s… and then we quickly grab everything and get it back in the car. A mere 30 sec’s after we get all the shit back into the car and get the doors closed…and LAPD cruiser sails by. Yoda is fucking lovin’ it… “take that man...you can’t catch us were too fuckin’ fast!” It was at this point that I began to wish I’d paid slightly more attention to Yoda’s resume before I hired her. She is a fuckin’ terrorist…and I am going to jail…I fuckin’ know it. I swear to Christ she’s humming the Mission Impossible theme…but whatever.

Cooprdog

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